What did they say?

Some time ago our good friend Rachel put together a relatively humorous list of "translations" from english (UK) to english (US).

As I am continuing to work on translations I was reminded of this list and how we (UK and US) most certainly do not speak the same language. I thought I would share, thanks again Rachel.

• lemonade/ 7up or Sprite
• lemon squash/ lemonade
• vest/ tank top
• waistcoat/ vest
• tank top/ old-school sweater vest
• cinema/ movie theatre
• film/ movie
• tomato sauce/ katchup
• fanny pack/ c*nt (don't ever say fanny!)
• bum bag/ fanny pack
• subway/ underground walk way
• tube/ subway
• plaster/ band-aid
• pull/ make out
• jumper/ sweater or sweatshirt*
• cheers/ thank you
• social security/ national insurance
• tea/ dinner
• dinner/ lunch
• dodgy/ sketchy
• pants/ underwear
  
• trousers/ pants
• jeans/ jeans
• fringe/ bangs
• trolley/ shoping cart
• bit/ part (and they say bit for EVERYTHING)
• chips/ french fries
• aubragine (OH-bra-zsheen)/ eggplant
• courgette (core-ZSHET)/ zucchini
• mobile/ cell phone (they never say cell phone)
• sorry/ excuse me (so when you bump into someone or you didn't hear what they said)
• excuse me/ can I please have your attention (when you need assistance)
• pound/ £
• stone/ 14 lbs. of weight
• boot/ trunk of a car
• bonnet/ hood of a car
• curry/ Indian food resturaunt (and also the spice)

Ah the sun

The weather here is really quite a challenge at times, not so much because it rains all the time or because it is cold but mostly because it changes so rapidly. Basically you just have to pack a little bit of kit for every imaginable weather condition. Back on easter weekend I recall leaving Marlborough in the snow and then it didnt rain (or snow) on us for the remainder of the day. As we left the house Saturday it was not clear but there didnt seem to be anything threatening in the sky but that changed quickly and it dumped on us all day. But then you get days like Sunday and it was sunny all day.

Wow you just wont believe how beautiful this place is when the sun is out. Tracey and I were commenting Saturday, as we spent all of it in the rain, that we weren't really tired of the rain yet. It is still quite novel and lovely. Even when spending all day outside.

But today we spent all day outside at Cholderton Rare Breeds Farm and it was lovely all day. Full sun and warmish temperatures, about 15 C. The farm was a great experience with Evan as there were all kinds of young lambs, chicks, goats, piggies, and ponies. I am sure we will go back as Evan was in full glory running about the farm from one paddock or another. The farm had pig races, tractors rides, and lots of play areas. In fact we had a bit of a melt down taking even from one play area with a trampoline in it. He was quite fond of bouncing.

Sean forgot to mention the part about us getting attacked in the goat yard. It seems that if you go in with food they are not shy about trying to take it. There was a warning sign but it wasn't until after we were both covered in muddy hoofprints that we realized how pushy these goats really are.

In the end it was a lovely day out in the countryside and I am sure we will go again.

Thoughts on driving in the British style

After 3 weeks here I think I am finally getting the hang of it all, driving that is. I follow three basic rules

1. Always stay to your left: I know it sounds stupid but forceably thinking about this really does help. Some interesting information about traffic directionality.
   
2. Always look to your right at intersections: Yield to the right, again DUH. But really scanning into a corner or roundabout on your right can save from a lot of abrupt hitting the brakes.
   
3. Know the width of your car: Some back country roads can be REALLY small. Knowing how wide your car is, including mirrors, can cut down a great deal of panic and stress. As well as save your mirrors.
   

With these 3 simple rules I have been able to stay mostly out of trouble. Not to say that I haven't had a few horns honked at me or lights flashed. Apparently I get a little aggressive with pushing into the roundabouts when it wasn't my turn. Guess I should read up?

To date we have successfully navigated to several fun destinations without breaking anything or anyone. There are some things I could do without:

1. "Safety Cameras", yeah right there for safety. Some people like them and some studies show that they work. I dont buy it.
   
2. Stop lights in roundabouts, WTF?!
3. Large lorries on small roads. Good god 2 cars are expected to drive on that?
4. Parallel parking over my left shoulder. Still not used to that.
   
5. Parking in small villages... there is none.

Those are the little niggles that really get me. But here are the things I love:

1. Roundabouts. You cant beat the pleasure of not having to come to a full stop when there is no one on your right.
   
2. Winding roads. Even at lower speeds they still seem fun and fast.
3. The yellow light before the green. Simply brilliant.
4. General overall politeness of drivers. They are really quite good about signaling, it must be the roundabouts.
   
5. Following the rules of slower drivers keep left.
   

Overall I am digging it. I probably would have opted for a smaller car as the Vauxhall. I recommend to you, should you travel here, rent a small one and pack lite. Not that I have any problem with Vauxhall or the Astra Estate model we have. It is just bigger than I want it to be when doing day to day stuff. It has been brilliant on the weekend trips as everything you could want fits nicely and has been comfortable to drive for hours at a time.

I look forward to riding motorcycles next. That is when roundabouts get to be fantastic!

Store hours

I am not one for griping about work and I certainly dont shy from working lots of hours. But it is really annoying to not have 24 hour or at least open late stores here. If I work my normal US day (7:30 to 18:00ish) then go home I barely have time to get to the store.

The grocery stores in Marlborough, and most other smaller towns, close at 8pm during the weekday. Last night I got home about 19:00 had a quick dinner and then sent Evan up for a bath. But I needed to get some ibuprofen as my neck has been killing me recently. So I left T to finish up with Evan in the bath and ran down to the Waitrose. I got there at 20:03 and the doors were closed. They are dead serious about closing at 20:00, no ifs ands or buts.

Even today I left work at 18:20, got home, got dinner, and then ran down again and just barely made it into the store. I know that there are stores in larger cities that are open later (ASDA aka WalMart) and of course you can find a liquor store with longer hours. But forget it if you want a chemist or something like that after 20:00.

Just takes some getting used to it I suppose. You really have to plan your days accordingly as it is difficult to just pop out to the store for a quick something.

A Visit With the Queen

I could've called this post, "I FOUND THE PUFFY-HAT GUYS!," or "It only takes 6 trains, 2 buses, and a Royal Procession to get Evan to sleep on time" but I thought the current title would be the best. Late Tuesday night Sean and I were watching the news during dinner. This is something we rarely do. They happened to mention that the following day there was going to be a Royal Procession in Windsor welcoming the president of France, Nicolas Sarkozy and his new former-model wife (also his 2nd wife who he dated for 80 days before marrying), Carla Bruni.

They hadn't had a royal procession in Windsor for 7 years. After some coaxing by Sean (since there was no other place I had to be that day), I decided to make the trek. It would take one bus and 3 different trains to get to Windsor (with Evan in tow) but I figured it would be worth it.

Wednesday: After approximately an hour and a half of uneventful travel Evan and I made it to the Slough station to catch the train to Windsor. We luckily met an English dad there with a boy Evan's age and the boys were able to converse in their own language of shrieking and "that's mine" until we got to Windsor. (I was also impressed by the very nice French boys on the train who were between 10 and 14 who happily talked to Evan and dove under some seats for a car he dropped without being asked.)

The streets were busy but not too packed and we were able to get a spot pretty close to the railing. There were military and police in the crowds, in the parade, and on the rooftops but all of them were super friendly saying "cheers" and "thank you" every time you moved for them to pass. The military band was great and played some songs while the crowd waited for the Queen.

First the Queen came from the Castle in a car with her husband to meet Sarkozy and do a very short ceremony at the train station. Then, the royal procession returned with Sarkozy to the Castle. Pictured Below (L-R): Queen in her car leaving castle. Prince Charles with Camilla and Gordon Brown(Prime Minister), and ?



















The procession returned to the Castle in
their formal carriages at full gallop (for security reasons I'm sure) which made it a little more difficult to catch but I got pictures of most of the big names. The Queen and entourage were deposited at the Castle and the military then marched from the Castle to some point behind it where the procession officially ended. Pictured Below (L-R): The Queen in her formal carriage with Sarcozy, the Queen's husband with Sarcozy's wife, Carla Bruni, some goofballs taking pictures of themselves in the Procession car (obviously not Royalty).











The streets had been covered with sand for the procession so shortly thereafter the streets were filled with street cleaning trucks and people sweeping by hand. Evan was sleeping in my pack by this point so I figured I would take this opportunity to walk over to Eton College (where Princes William and Harry had attended school). Unfortunately, the students were on holiday but I did take a look around the grounds and see the chapel, which was beautiful. (Initially I couldn't actually open the chapel doors which was strange since I had to pay to visit the chapel. For a moment I hoped it wasn't some kind of bad sign, a concern I voiced to the school porter when I found him - a man who oddly-enough looked to be dressed like a priest which is even stranger since William ran most of the Catholics out of England in the 1400's. Anyway, he assured me I just hadn't been operating the antiquated door ring correctly but when he couldn't open it either he realized the chapel had not yet been unlocked for the day.) We got the train back to Slough from Windsor at about 2pm and I ran into the English dad again who mentioned that he had never seen the procession travel that quickly before. Everything went fine until the last train. Evan had been chasing pigeons and jumping in puddles at the Reading station during our 20 minute layover. (On a side note: I utilized the toddler leash today. I would highly recommend it. I swear that Evan would have chased those pigeons onto the tracks if I didn't have him leashed. Judge me, if you must...). When we boarded the Reading to Bedwyn train Evan was both exhausted and wound up and the train was crowded. The only open spots were across from a businessman reading the paper and we were trapped inside by two people sitting in the aisle seats (who were somewhat handicapped and not able to move easily for us). Evan was kicking and screaming and stepping on the businessman's shiny shoes (I'm convinced on purpose because the man kept moving his feet away) until I finally got him calmed down and he got very quiet. Luckily, the remainder of the trip went smoothly. I think Evan enjoyed the trains more than the Queen's Procession but I think the trip was worth it if for no other reason than, I found the Puffy-Hat Guys (and the Queen, of Course)!

I'm dreaming of a white...EASTER?!

It snowed this Easter. It also hailed and rained. But there was sun! At least enough sun to get in an Easter egg hunt for Evan. We also dyed Easter Eggs.

Ben and Rachel joined us for our Easter meal. We had almost as much dessert as we had real food since I couldn't decide on the desserts. We also had cheese which was great except for the one that was so stinky that I couldn't get past the smell and I made Sean push it to the other side of the table.

Then we watched "The Commitments" since Rachel and Ben hadn't seen it, while Evan napped.

Overall, a successful holiday!

A Dinner to Remember

Sean and I don't have a babysitter here but we do have a Rachel. A kind soul (our neighbors daughter) who happily watches Evan for us when she can, but she's only here for about another month. So, Saturday night I made a dinner reservation for Sean and I to go out alone since I don't know if we'll be able to find a sitter here.

Of course, if we were going out to dinner and we were going to spend a fortune (with the exchange rate) I decided that we were surely going to go someplace good. Shaun M. had told us that there was a restaurant not too far from us that was one of the few Michelin star rating in England. For those of you who are not food snobs this means that the restaurant has been recognized internationally as being exceptional.

So, I had to go.

I should have known when we drove up and there was a Lamborghini out front and little flames coming up from a pond that it was going to cost a small fortune but I have to say. IT WAS WORTH IT! (If you've ever seen Ratatouille, the way I love food is like that rat but without the skills to cook it).

The food was so good that I almost cried. We got the tasting menu which had ten small courses with the wine pairing (not something we thought about when we drank the half bottle of wine before the meal). There are people who take your coat, people who seat you, people who serve you food, the wine servers, and they even show you to the bathroom.

I told Sean that it was good we were happily married or I might propose to the chef.

It was amazing! And as Rachel liked to remind me, at least I didn't have to pay for a sitter, which made it okay to spend a little more on dinner. You can check out the place yourself at http://www.the-vineyard.co.uk/.

So f you are ever in the west Wiltshire county area I highly recommend stopping for dinner here. Just make sure you bring enough cash or plastic.

American Cookies

Strangely enough, it's very difficult to find chocolate chips here. More importantly, Nestles semi-sweet morsels. Thankfully, my mom shipped me a bag of chips for Easter. So, on Saturday, Rachel and I made the cookies. They turned out pretty good considering I had to cook them in the Aga and the butter tastes a little different here.

I brought them to my neighbors. They seemed very appreciative. The mom on one side got a good laugh when I handed her the cookies and said, "Tell your son Thank You for keeping his music down." (Something that has been a bit of a problem since his room is right next to ours and he has a love for techno. This probably would have been okay a few years ago but Evan can't sleep. He just covers his ears and says "No Music".) It was also a bit of a peace offering since Sean was telling Rachel about our previous noise problems, mimicking the neighbors mom screaming for him to turn the music down, while walking out the front door, at exactly the moment the guy and eight of his friends passed our door. Uncomfortable...We hope he didn't understand the accent.

A Flustery, Blustery Day

Daily life and tourist activities have been getting in the way of our blogging, so we'll cover last week today.

It has been a 4 day holiday in the UK. They have bank holidays for Good Friday and one on Monday as part of the Easter celebration. They are serious about their bank holidays here. Everything except amusement parks, video, and liquor stores seem to shut down.

So we decided to venture out to Legoland with Evan. Rachel came to stay with us for the weekend (which was great) and we chose to go on Friday since it seemed like it would have the best weather for the weekend.

Friday morning started out sunny, as we got into the car to leave it was very cold and raining. As we drove the hour to get to Legoland it went from about 40 degrees Fahrenheit to freezing to snowing within a ten mile stretch. By the time we got to Windsor it was sunny again and we had a great day at Legoland. Evan loved the train and spent about a half an hour in a Lego car that didn't go anywhere (I guess it doesn't take much to amuse a two-year-old).

We got a donut that tasted like white bread with chocolate frosting and a "New York Style" footlong hotdog which was a hotdog put on a baguette: rather disappointing. However, their chocolate dipped waffle with sprinkles was wonderful. Sean and I were reminded of a lesson we learned a long time ago and had forgotten to abide by: when traveling, don't get familiar food because it will almost always be nothing like you expect it to be.

After Legoland we decided to venture out to Windsor Castle (the official residence of the Queen and the largest inhabited castle). I was hoping to fulfill my desire to take a picture with the "puffy-hat guys" (what I like to call them). You know the guys who guard the castle and can't smile and are in every comedy film that includes London. But NO! There were no Puffy-hat guys, just a picture! Where are you puffy-hat guys???! I've been to Buckingham Palace, I've been to Windsor Castle, where do you have to go to find them???!! It's a question that plaques my mind. I've even researched it online and have found nothing conclusive.

When we reached the castle it was closed. We took some pictures (Rachel swears the "bobby" on the right of this picture kept moving over in order to be in it) and decided to walk down to Eton. Apparently the students there have to wear top hats and tails which I was equally excited about but they were not in school that day so I knew that I wouldn't see them.

About halfway there the sky went from sunny to thunder, lightning, and hail so we had to run all the way back to the car. Poor Evan was in his backpack and unprotected from the elements. (This picture is of Rachel, Sean and Evan running through the downpour).

Rainy weekends 2

I guess I shouldnt keep titling my posts with Rainy Weekend there could be a lot titled that way.

When the rain started on Saturday night it really came down and rained continuously all night long until about 10 this Sunday morning. We have this skylight in the bedroom upstairs so we can clearly hear the rain pounding on it at night, which is quite nice. I am going on about the rain because of what it can do to the little roads we have to drive 'round 'ere.

We had a little bit of a lazy morning but had arranged with my cousin Julian to meet his family down in Shapwick which is south of us in county Dorset, so we had to get rolling before to long. I sure could have used some more sleep though. Julian and his family had been over to the states a few years back on an around the world trip so Tracey and I were excited to seem them again.

As we were navigating our way down there, again by way of Google Maps on the blackberry, I noticed that the smaller roads we had to take were not really holding up well to the abundance of rain. I had thought that in a country where it rains so much there would be better drainage or something. I came across quite a few places where the road was completely covered by standing water. Making travel all the more exciting.

In fact as part of our journey we had to drive some REALLY small roads. I thought I was used to the small roads but these were ridiculous. I dont think you could fit to carriages down them but we managed to squeek by several cars without scraping the left side of the car or Tracey getting all stressed out and yelling "CURB!" at me every few seconds. Curb is our signal for when I am getting to close to the left side of the road for comfort. There was a even a small part of our journey that we thought we might have a to make a water crossing as the signs pointed us across a small creek running at about 1.5 feet of water. Luckily we didn't have to wind up going that way as I have no idea how the Vauxhall would handle that.

Lucky for us the rain had stopped and most of the flooded section of the road we had to travel on the way down were more or less dry on the way home later that evening.

We had a great time at Julian's place. He and his wife Christine have 4 kids and one more soon to come in Sept. They have 2 older boys Jordan (12) and Conner (10) and then 2 girls Kate (6 in 2 weeks) and Tess (2). They were a most gracious family to stay with for the day and they had wonderful food to eat. It seems like we ate all day long and Evan played constantly with the other kids.

We did take a short trip to an old iron age fort which is literally at the end of the road from where Julian lives. In this google link you can see the concentric rings which were different battlements used to protect the local warlord (or whomever). It is a really cool view but we didnt plan very well on the footwear as it was VERY muddy. We did remember to bring Evans wellies (Wellington boots for the uninitiated) but Tracey and I were pretty much screwed. I wont be wearing those shoes to work tomorrow. At one point I wound up carrying Evan (which has the added benefit of getting his muddy feet on my pants and jacket) and slipped walking down one of the embankments. Made a right mess of my pants and Evan wasn't to0 pleased with me either.

He did however really enjoy stomping about in the mud puddles found everywhere you turn. I was worried he would wind up putting his foot in the mud and pulling his foot out. Making a mess of all his clothes not just his pants. But as fortune had it all we had to clean up was his pants. I however sat around for the remainder of the evening damp and muddy.

Luckily the kids all had a great time. I really enjoyed talking with Julian and Christine and playing with Kate and Tess. Kate seems to have an endless supply of energy and wanted me to put her on my shoulders regularly. I really enjoyed being immersed in a truly English family for an afternoon. It was warm and inviting in all the chaos of children, smells of good food, and wonderful conversation.

Tracey and I hope to go back to see them all again soon. Apparently Kate and Conner are in a dance show/recital soon. Maybe we will go down to see that.

Rainy weekends

It was a rainy weekend here but we managed to have fun anyway. We took Evan down to see a steam locomotive line in New Alresford called the Mid Hants Railway (Watercress Line). It is only about an hours drive from home so we could leave in the late morning and still enjoy a good time. It is a remarkable about of work that this all volunteer group do to keep the trains rolling and give a really wonderful experience to young and old alike.

Evan of course was absolutely floored by the trains. He is a big fan of Thomas the tank engine and was convinced that this train we were on was a Thomas when we started. All of the cars and engines are restored and give a very classic feel to the short 4 stop journey. All staff members are also in period costume on the weekends.

I am sure this place is packed on the weekends but we were lucky to find it relatively empty on our journey.

At the first stop they have a train yard where they are repairing other engines and railcars. It looks like they also do a special weekend where "Thomas" will be there to pull cars. They have taken one of their older engines and painted it to look like Thomas which is so wonderful for the little ones. Evan was so happy he was making train sounds pretty much the entire way outbound.

We got to have a nice little lunch on the train and a spot of tea. The rain started coming down about 17:00 so we decided to pack it in and head for home as we were all very tired. In all it was a great day. I will make sure to post some pictures later.

Spotted Dick (I bet I have your attention now...)

No. This is not a personal condition, nor is it a disease. It is an English dessert.

So, I had to try it. If this is not cultural immersion, I don't know what is...

I picked up a package of it at Marks & Spencer (kind of like a UK Trader Joe's). The packaging describes it as, "suet puddings studded with currants and topped with a creamy vanilla custard."

I found it to be a mediocre bread pudding with custard on top.

Sean still won't try it.
[SEAN]: Ok so I finally tried it. Yeah kind of unremarkable. And the name just still weirds me out. I think I would have preferred the lava cake that Tracey and Ben were eating.

So, now you know....

Weird Stuff

Yesterday,
...someone (an English person) stopped Sean and I to ask us where to get a cup of coffee in town and we were actually able to help them.

...One of the moms in the playgroup I attended asked if I was Canadian.

...I saw a Renault Clio commercial that showed a tourist bus driving through Beverly Hills and when it passed, an American guy (who supposedly lives in Beverly Hills) yells to his neighbors that it's okay to leave and they all drive out of their garages in a Renault Clio (economy car). Why Beverly Hills? Why an American actor? Do they even sell Renault Clios in the US? (probably not)

...I watched a 15 minute segment on NASCAR on a British show that actually made me want to go experience the Daytona 500. And I learned more about the Daytona 500 in that show than during my actual trip to Daytona, or all my years living in the US. (Did you know that drivers originally raced in Daytona on the straight flat beaches and only built the racetrack when they ran out of room on the beach? Or that the cars were originally built to ferry liquor across the border during prohibition and they started racing after prohibition ended?)

Things I Love About England

Things were a little rough the first week here but I don't want to give the wrong impression. So I decided this post to talk about all the things I love about England in addition to the inexpensive wine.

1. The produce smells and tastes like it looks. The grocery stores in the states like to sell a lot of imitation produce. Stuff that has been so engineered to travel and store well that it has lost its' natural smell and taste. Here, if it looks like a tomato it will also smell and taste like a tomato. (But, no, it won't last for two weeks, more like 3 days: okay with me.)

2. I can walk to get meat from my local butcher, cheese from the cheese shop, and produce from the farmers market. There's something nice about meeting and talking to the people you purchase your food from. You actually feel a sense of community and they are more than happy to advise you on what to get and where to go to get it, no matter the topic.

3. It only takes 20 minutes to get to a place where you can let your child run amongst the remains of a castle built around the time of the crusades. Crazy!

4. No guns (except for hunting).

5. The news is incredibly boring (see #4). Either they don't talk about it or the occurrence of : drug busts, drive-by shootings, etc.. is rare to non-existent. I feel way safer here than I do in the states. The only time I worry about random criminal acts is when I'm in London proper where I do worry about pick-pockets. Not a big deal as far as criminal acts go.

6. People are incredibly helpful and civil and always offering you tea. I have yet to witness a confrontation here. I think as a culture it is far less acceptable to lose your temper, yell, be rude, etc. Quite refreshing!

7. It's not hot! I HATE the heat! It's so much nicer to run in the rain than the heat.

8. Government funding. So, they are highly taxed here and I'm convinced the government has a hand in everything but there are some wonderful things that come from this. For instance, there is a place in town called the Children's house that exists solely as a resource for parents. They have playgroups there, listings of childcare facilities, you can "rent" out bags full of beautiful, practically new toys and activities and keep them as long as you want, then turn them in for a new bag and it only costs 2 pounds per bag. Thank you government subsidies!

9. It's clean. It is rare that I see trash, graffitti, or homeless people. Maybe it's the rain and the cold but maybe it's just the way of things here as well.

10. It's not home, but it's close to it. I can get pretty much everything I get in the states here from my cereal to my music and movies with the added bonus of being able to get to France in 2 hours, or hopping on a train to London to see a world class theatre production. Not so bad...If only I could find a good babysitter to help out through August...

To Stonehenge or not to Stonehenge

Lots of people go to see Stonehenge when they come to England. I can see why it is pretty neat looking and has a wonderful mystique to it. But honestly I have seen better.

We took a drive out there today as we had some time in the afternoon and it is only about 45 minutes drive from Marlborough. After we got the new car, see previous post about fun with cars, we wanted to get out of the house for a bit. So we grabbed a map and hit the road.

Unfortunately our map did not cover that area so I pulled out the trusty and oh so wonderful Google Maps on my Blackberry which we have done quite a bit of navigation by. Tied in a quick search for Stonehenge and off we went. We had some lovely roads to drive on getting there and had no trouble at all finding it as it is a fairly large ring of big rocks.

We got there at closing time so we could not park in the car park across the street from the rocks. So we just pulled into a small road a bit further down and walked back. No paying for parking here! As the place was now closed we could not go inside the main fence but you can still see plenty. Even if you do get inside you cant go up and touch the rocks or anything you are kept back on a pathway about 100+ feet away from the stones. Not really all that much to see and do here. So we decide to head down the road to a town called Avebury.

Shaun M had taken Ed and I to see Avebury and have a pint at the Red Lion back in Sept so I knew it was pretty cool. Basically Avebury is a larger if somewhat differently organized version of Stonehenge. Supposedly the Avebury site predates Stonehenge by 500 years. In this site you can walk all around the stones and really experience the site. You can even touch them, just tread lightly please. It is a much cooler experience than Stonehenge in my opinion and you can have a pint right across the road.

So if you have a chance to see only one 5000+ year or stone circle go see Avebury. But I guess if you have more time go see both. They really are not that far from each other. We managed to see both in about 2 hours.

The troubles with cars

Man I thought getting a car for our travels around the UK would be pretty straight forward, but I was dead wrong on that one. In the first week of our being here I have now driven 3 different cars. But I go too far let me back track a bit just so you can all learn from the fun.

Back at the beginning of Jan when we were lining up dates to move over here I looked into the purchase repurchase program that is run through Renault and Peugeot. Whereby a non EU citizen can "lease" a car for up to 183 days and at the end of that time turn the car back in for very reasonable prices. The car is brand new and can be driven anywhere in the greater European Community, even Italy which most rental car companies don't like you to do. The car I had found was a Peugeot 307. Which would be plenty big to take Tracey and Evan and I on our journeys with plenty of room for baggage and possibly guests from time to time. The monthly cost that I read on the websites and from calling different companies to run this program were about $1000/mo. If you haven't done any long term rental pricing you should know that this is a great deal. It is designed for people who are coming over for more than 2 weeks. They will even have a driver pick you up at Heathrow and take you to your new car.

So thinking I had it all in hand I was waiting until we knew the actual move date so I could schedule the pickup of the car. When I finally did call it was about 30 days before the move and to my dismay I learned that while I could get the car I wanted I could not get it in the right hand drive, RHD, that I need for the UK. Peugeot was happy to deliver a left hand drive to me. But then I thought of the sheer stupidity of getting a left hand drive car in a country designed for right hand drive. Can you imagine trying to pass on the lovely small roads out in the countryside from a left hand drive? What about going through toll booths? Obviously not a workable solution.

After pestering the companies I was talking to it turns out that apparently Renault and Peugeot are no longer going to support the RHD in this program. But yet they are willing to lease me a LHD. In my mind this means that they are no longer really supporting this program in the UK and Ireland. It looks to work fine if you want to go to the continent but not to the isles. Lunacy.

So upon telling my sob story to Shaun M he kindly offered to take on the task of finding me a car for while we are here. Silly man. He did some research and some price haggling and told us that he had lined something up for about 400 GBP per month. Sounded good to me, so began the next set of troubles.

If you have read earlier posts you have heard about the car issues. They began when the company that Shaun arranged with Wiltshire Car Hire, on Marlborough road in Old Towne Swindon, dropped off the Citroen C5 as arranged at our new place in Marlborough. It looked nice if dirty on the outside but reeked of cigarettes on the inside. But hey I have worked very closely with smokers for many years (Dave) I can handle the smell, and the price was right.

That evening I got my first taste of driving on the left side of the road as the Wiltshire Car agent left the car parked in a no parking zone and dropped me the keys with a lovely " 'ave a nice day deary". So I jumped in, before the Marlborough parking Nazis came around, and managed to find a parking spot about half a mile down the road. All seemed to be fine except for the hike back to the house.

The next morning (Sunday) as we headed about our day to get the house setup Tracey and I hiked out to the car to find that it would not start. Not even a click from the starter solenoid. Hmm... that means dead battery. I checked the completely foreign controls on the dash and found that in my haste of driving the previous afternoon I had tripped the parking lamps on. When I parked the car I did not notice any ding or beep that there were lights on. Oh well.

So we call David at Wiltshire Car Hire to get some help as there is supposed to be roadside assistance on this car. We get David on his mobile and tell him the story. He reports that he is "in the wild" today and won't be able to do anything about it until Monday. I ask for some kind of roadside assist program and he says that he has RAC (Royal Automobile Club) but doesn't have the account number. When asked if he could call and get them to come out he tells me that I should be able to just call the RAC and tell them it is with his account. I skeptically said ok and signed off to find a number for the RAC which David did not have either. Does his car never breakdown in the "wild"?

Surprisingly I did manage to find a number for the RAC and they even sent over a support van in about an hour. So if you ever need car service in the greater Swindon area just call RAC and tell them you have a rental through Wiltshire Car Hire and ask if they can look up the account number. Apparently that is good enough to get some help. AAA would be mortified by that I am sure.

The RAC bloke jumps the car. I grab Tracey and we head of for Swindon to run some errands. I stop and start the car 2 more times that day with no troubles. Drove it for about 50 miles or so with well over an hour of drive time to charge the battery. I even stopped and put in about 50 GBP in gas as it was pretty much empty when they dropped it off.

Monday starts nice and early as we want to head out to do more errands. We had managed to get a parking spot close to the house on the previous evening (which we were stoked about because I didn't have to take 17 passes at parallel parking over my left shoulder). We load up everyone in the car and it wont start. DAMN! No, I did not leave any lights on it just does not have enough power to turn the engine over.

We unload everyone from the car and call David at Wiltshire again. David says that he won't be able to get out to swap the car until the next day. I decide not to call RAC again for a jump but instead wait for a new car the next day. Which David said would be there by half 8, which is 8:30 for the rest of us.

Tuesday we wait for the new car. Call David at 8:45 he says the new one is on the way. At 9:10 the new car shows up a lovely little Rover with plush leather seats, a SatNav, and no gas in it. The lady who drops it off has a "mechanic" with her who speaks no English, she speaks no Polish by the way. He is Polish and is coming out to jump the Citroen with the Rover than take the Citroen back to Swindon. The lady ( I still don't know her name) and the mechanic bicker a little about how to get the Citroen jumped but manage to work it out. She hands me the keys to the Rover and off they go. No word about how to use the SatNav, about the 50 quid of gas I put in the Citroen, or even if we are getting the Citroen back or keeping the Rover.

We decide to go run the errands we were trying to do on Monday. After struggling with Evan's car seat for 30 minutes we come to the conclusion that there is no nice way to install a child's car seat in a Rover and buckle it in as best we can. Tracey is not amused by this and wants to get the Citroen back because the car seat fit beautifully in there. The Rover drives wonderfully this is a MUCH nicer car than the Citroen. Sunroof, indash SatNav, indash TV, plenty of power, it didn't smell like cigarettes and leather seats. I was happy to drive this one for a while. But Tracey is not and hounds me to find out when we are getting the Citroen back.

Wed goes by without much ado.

Thurs I drive into the office to help out with the setup and ring David again at Wiltshire to ask about swapping back to the Citroen. He says that they have put in a new battery to the car and it runs just fine. He would be happy to swing it by the office and make the switch. I tell them where the office is and where they can park at the office. Then about 2 hours later the same lady comes back with the Citroen which she parks across the street at the Co-op food store (grocery store). Which of course is private parking and they really don't like it when you park there and don't shop there. So I haul the car seat out of the Rover and hand over the keys. As the lady gives me the keys to the Citroen she has me sign a pickup form saying that we are exchanging the Citroen to the Rover and back to the Citroen. Why didn't she do that when she handed over the Rover? Then she asks if I have insurance for the Citroen. Um, no, isn't that part of the rental? Apparently not. I tell her that Shaun M arranged the hire and I would have call to clear it all up.

After telling Shaun this he gets a dour look on his face and says "that is complete Shite". Basically his arrangement with David was to include insurance otherwise he would never have rented the car through him. So Shaun calls David on Friday and tries to clear things up. Apparently it doesn't go so well. The short version is something like this:

Shaun: What do you mean there is no insurance on the car?! You said there would be at that price you quoted.
David: No, I didn't, and you are stupid for thinking so.
Shaun: This isn't working out and the car is really sub-standard
David: Your man driving it is a knob for running the battery down.
David then hangs up. I paraphrase here but you get the drift. Shaun then tells me not to drive the car any longer and that we will find another solution promptly.

Saturday Shaun drops by to pick me and the Citroen up and drive up into Swindon to drop off the car at our office. Shaun is personally insured so he can drive anything he wants so no worries about driving the Citroen. Shaun has to park in the back of beyond like I did on the first Saturday we were here as Marlborough is a very busy little town on Saturdays.

When we get in the Citroen to drive off, the car does not start. F#$@%@$#%@$K! Apparently there is an engine imobilisier on the car that pairs the key fob we have to the car so it will only start with this key. Now we are not sure what the exact problem is but we are 2 relatively smart guys here. We think the key fob battery is running a bit low and not actually communicating with the car imobilisier. So therefore we get the "Engine Imobilisier Fault" message on the dash when trying to start. Just Great.

So we hike up to Shaun's car. A lovely new Porsche Carrera S, damn that is nice. And haul donkey to Swindon to pickup a new car with a new rental company.

We make it just before the office is to close and start the necessary paperwork. At which point Shaun goes to fill up his car and leaves me to finish the paperwork. They chap behind the desk goes to run the payment and tells me it will be 950 GBP per month. After choking on my breath mint I tell him that doesn't sound right and that he should wait for Shaun to confirm as I, again, did not make the arrangements. We wait a few minutes for Shaun.

Shaun tells the guy we had a quote at 570 GBP per month. The guy can't see that price and can't apply any computer magic to make that price appear. So he calls for help. He explains the story with some facts coming from Shaun. No help forthcoming from the first call. So he goes up the ladder and explains the story again. Closing time has come and gone for this little one man office. Luckily he is very keen to stay and work this out for us. Eventually his persistence pays off and we get the rate locked in. After 2 hours of waiting I am now the new user of a Vauxhaull Astra.

All seems to be worked out now and I hope that we don't run into any more car issues. I think we have had enough. We took the new new car out for a drive to Stonehenge today and had a good time doing it.

My thanks to Shaun for continuing to find a car solution for us.

Taking out the Rubbish

Where we live there are no rubbish bins(trash cans). There are 3 black boxes about beer cooler size where you can put cans, cardboard/paper, and glass out every other Monday. Instead of a roll-away trash can we are given county provided trash bags about the size of a tall kitchen bag. As far as I can figure out you are only allowed 1 per week curbside. So not sorting your recyclable goods is really not an option if you don't want to start your own personal dump in your garden.

There is also a recycling center in town that takes plastic bottles. I've already started smuggling non-bottle plastic waste into the bins at the recycling center. Soon I may be taking midnight strolls to park and city waste receptacles...

A Week in Review

We've been so busy trying to adjust to things that I've missed a few days.

I would skip these stories but I'm sure that, in time, we'll be able to laugh about them.

Saturday, March 1st: Sean gets our car and accidentally leaves the lights on, kills the battery. This is not something I would bring up, since it's still a bit of a sore subject with him (it's not like he did it on purpose), but it ties into some of the other events of the week.

Sunday, March 2nd: Finally wake up at 11:30am and get ourselves together to go do the big shopping trip to Walmart (yes, they are taking over the world) though it's called ASDA here (still says Walmart on the building). Leave Evan with Rachel and go to the car. Car is dead. Wait for jumpstart from local AAA type company. Go to Swindon (should have been a 20 minute trip, takes 40 minutes). Get lost 2 times. Find ASDA delivery truck on the road and ask driver for directions. Driver tells us where it is and that it closed 10 minutes ago at 4pm (government regulated hours on Sundays). Go home with still no shampoo or toothpaste, etc... Also can not now buy groceries because the grocery stores are closed as well.

Go to local non kid-friendly pub for dinner. Rachel attempts to order a grilled cheese sandwich for Evan. Gets a non-grilled sandwich of cold bread and shredded cheese. Sends sandwich back and finally gets a passable grilled cheese (which Evan eats none of and just has fries, aka "chips" instead).

Monday, March 3rd: Attempt ASDA trip again with Evan. Car dead. Car company comes and takes car away for the day and tells us we can't get a replacement car until morning. Evan learns how to say "car broken".

We go grocery shopping instead. Thank god for "Waitrose" commonly understood to be the best grocery store in England and I find everything I want there. Unfortunately they tell me that they can not take my American credit cards, they only take "chip and pin" cards (European credit cards require a pin, like an atm card and are not swiped like ours). Empty barclays account to pay for groceries. Only 5 pounds left in account and 40 pounds in my pocket. Still no sign of wire transfer.

Tuesday, March 4th: The house is cold along with the towel racks. The towel racks in this house all have warmers that are plumbed into the house. I can't find the owners' number.

Mental Breakdown- No heat, no money, no car. Had to stop and cry. Felt a little overwhelmed and it all hit me at once. Sean thought I was losing my mind. We'd be getting a new car today, he would pick up his business card from Shaun M to tide us over on cash, we would find the owners' number.

Well, I didn't quite find the owners' paper with the phone numbers but I found the paper that was under it when she wrote them down. I am able to make out the indentations on the paper enough to give the owners a call. They are kind enough to walk us through re-lighting the pilot light on the boiler and are also able to tell me where the list of phone numbers is again. So, we have heat again.

We have found a school for Evan in walking distance from our house and the teachers there are wonderful. They allow Evan in with 1 days notice for a Tues/Thurs schedule. He gets involved with playing as soon as we arrive. He happily waves goodbye to us and we're off to Barclays to check on that wire.

1 Hour Later: Just leaving Barclays after getting no useful information. Still no money.

Go to Swindon. Sean tries to get 4 mobile phones for the office. They give us 1 mobile phone with a 100 pound deposit. The guy who runs the store tells us that getting credit in England is rather difficult. He had to have his dad get a phone for him when he returned from France at 30 years old.

Go to get Sean's business bank card to tide us over until the wire comes through.

Go pick up Evan from school. He stops to hug and say bye to 4 children from school. We're worried he's going to have to hug the whole class before we leave. The kids run to the school door and Evan yells "BYE!" all the way down the path to the buggy(stroller).

Finally, we get to ASDA(Walmart) and it is everything we dreamed it would be! We even eat dinner there, definitely not good but hot and affordable. Evan pushes a Tonka truck with a motorcycle trailer across the entire store so we decide to get it for him.

The newer new car, while much nicer isn't really made for child seats. Evan's seat practically tips over when we turn a corner. We'll deal with that later...

EVAN'S MENTAL BREAKDOWN. Evan screams inconsolably from bedtime until 4am with occasional bouts of sleep. Sean and I feel like we may die from exhaustion and that brings us into...

Wednesday, March 5th: Accomplish very little. Finish shopping for house stuff. Eat at McDonald's where they charge us for ketchup and the girl behind the counter doesn't understand what I'm saying when I ask, "Can I get a small beverage, fountain drink, soda???" There are no fountains in the common areas of fast food places because there are not free refills. She understands "Coke."

Thursday, March 6th: Here comes the sun...Finally, the wire transfer comes through. The box arrives that DHL has been holding in customs all week. Evan goes to school again. Sean goes into the office and I am able to stop by the local cheese shop. Things are finally coming together and we may all be sane again soon.

Friday, March 7th: Never thought I'd enjoy normal life so much.

You want me to cook on that??! and "Oh Water Pressure, how I miss thee..."

Tracey: So, our new house has an AGA. A what?? Well, for those not in the know an AGA would be a cast iron stove. Look out you electric stovetop complainers! I have an AGA!

This stove is not just a stove, it also is the boiler for the house water. So you only really get half a stove and it takes so long to heat that even the "AGA" cookbooks tell you to never turn the stove off. Since there is no actual temperature given for the oven, the book recommends you get a thermometer and find out what the actual temperature is for the different settings. The settings are in Gas Marks 1 through 9. What this means is not truly clear. The other thing they tell you in the manuals is that 80 percent of your cooking should be done in the oven and only 20 percent on the stovetop since so much heat is lost when you raise the stovetop cover that you don't have enough heat to cook the rest of your food. When did you last cook in your stove? I can tell you that my in-oven percentage would have been well under the 80 percent mark.

The books did mention a great feature of the stove. You can dry your dishes on top of it, "hatch an egg", or "bring a pig with pneumonia back to health." You may think I'm kidding but, I'm not. So, I don't have to purchase that drying rack, Yay!

Which brings us to our next cultural change...water and its' consumption. The water pressure here is regulated by the government (much like store hours on Sunday) so while it is more than a dribble it is far less than the cascading waterfall I'm used to. Darn those eco-conscious people!! (I thought I was one of them until I experienced the European shower: May start having to take baths.)

Then there's the dishes. I like to wash them one at a time but since my kitchen is at basement level I'm starting to get a complex about it. Every time I run the kitchen water I have to listen to the "glug glug" of it getting pumped back to street level. I feel like the evil American consumer taking mother nature to her death.

On a lighter note, the wine is cheap!!!! And wonderful! Even with the 2.13 US dollars for every British pound exchange rate we have going on the good wine is still cheaper than in the US.

Maybe if I drink enough wine I won't care about the showers...HaHa!

A VERY LONG FLIGHT

So, we were those parents...the ones with the child kicking the seats. The initial check-in at the San Luis Obispo airport and the flight to LAX went just fine. It was the 10hour flight after that that proved to be a problem.

Evan was in all his 2 year old splendor and, of course, in front of him and behind him were older couples. Not the patient grandparent types, more like the never-had-kids, easily irritated types.

So, for the first 4 hours or so there was Evan fidgeting (and Sean not noticing him kicking the seats because he was watching the featured film). [SEAN]: I was paying attention I just missed the first few kicks. I did however sit with him for 8 of the 10 hours of flying. Hence, the dirty looks from the passenger in front of Evan even while Sean was holding Evan's feet and telling him no.

Then there was 40 times I sang the "Winnie the Pooh" song which Evan listened to quietly just long enough to learn the words himself and sing along with me. So much for sleeping...

Then there were the 2 trips to the bathroom where I threatened the child with everything I could think of: taking toys away, time outs, bodily harm.

The 2nd trip to the bathroom started and ended with a lot of screaming until he finally went to daddy and fell asleep.

Though I have not experienced hell, this is close to what I would imagine it to be.

So, thank heavens it finally ended. Getting the 11 items we brought out of Heathrow and to the house went relatively well. Good thing Shaun M's girl friend got a bigger car.

Saturday afternoon Rachel (our US neighbors daughter) showed up and watched Evan while we were shown the house and met our very amusing landlords, who we had beers and wine with before they departed.

In all a successful 24+ hours of travel.

First few days

It is quite amazing the things you learn when immersed in a culture in place of reading about or even just vacationing it one. Like 'grilled cheese sandwich' is not a universally understood concept at restaurants, or grocery stores that are open after 16:30 on a Sunday. I know it seems obvious that immersion allows you to learn more about a culture but what I had not realized is how much work it is to live somewhere you are not comfortable with or familiar with. But let me start chronologically with a quick review of major items for the first few days.

FLIGHT OUT
The flight out went pretty well the SLO to LA leg was no trouble at all except a little late. Evan had good fun with being in the airplane again. He had been a bit cranky recently but was ok for this hop. However the long haul was a different story. Lets just say that I dont think the people sitting in front of Evan and I were really pleased about their journey. He did however finally sleep for the last 4 hours of the flight. I however did not get any sleep.

CELL PHONE
It is surprising how much one can rely on a cell phone. Of course you dont really learn this until you dont have one or at least a working one. For some reason my phone didnt flip over to GSM coverage upon arrival which leaves it in a non functioning mode. Why do we really need so many different radio bands for cell phone coverage?

DRIVING
I got the car on Saturday afternoon. A Citroen C5, I think it is a model year 2003. It is nice looking and seems to drive ok except for the smelling like smoke. Obviously a smoker had it before me.

The first thing I had to do was find a place to park it. Which is no easy task on Kingsbury street. I drove around for at least 20 minutes working out the "stay on the left" issues and trying to figure out all the funny road rules and "best practices". I finally found a place up the road about half a mile by the rugby pitch, and then hiked home.

It is interesting to figure out the driving protocol of how to slip by another car on a "2 way" road when there are already cars parked on one side so there is effectively only one lane left to use. They do this all the time and it has boggled my mind how this can be an effective form of parking/driving. But everyone seems to get along with it. I think the protocol is that if your lane is the one with the parked cars in it you have to wait for a break in the on-coming traffic and then dash into their lane to slip by the parked car. If you are the on-coming traffic and come across a car coming at you in your lane while passing a parked car you must wait for it to slip by the parked car then proceed. As the car "in the wrong lane" you are obliged to wave politely at the on-coming car who is waiting for you and to slip back into your lane as quickly as possible as the on-coming car really doesnt leave you much room.

We did make one trip into Swindon on Sunday evening to Drop off Rachel at the train station. Which went well more or less. I havent hit anything or broken any major laws that I can tell. We also got to experience the Magic Roundabout. And we lived to talk about it. Only once did it seem that we were going to get crushed by a bus. Must remember yield to your right!